Longing
by YouStarteldTheSister
Summary: Heavy is alone, Medic is in love, and the sandwich becomes a best friend.
1. Chapter 1

It was safe to say he was jealous, maybe even a little obsessive as of late, but it wasn't like there was much he could do about it. The smaller man filled his head thoughts like a woman fills a pot with water when cooking a meal. Even now, with his hulking form hidden in the shadows, eyes trained on the small opening in the doorway the thoughts filled him.. only it wasn't just thoughts anymore, there were feelings too. Wants, needs, cravings, all these things filled his oversize body and lead to the stalker like behavior he was currently possessing.

A nice, deep moan came from the other room and Heavy had to bite his bottom lip. How he wished he could be the one that caused Medic to moan in such a way. But as close as they were, they were no closer then brothers would be, the german's heart belonged to someone else. He'd never felt anything towards the spook, and he had no idea what his comrade saw in the frenchman, but right now he was so envious of the two of them there was no words to describe this type of jealousy. But he was not the type to try and purposely break them up. All the gentle giant could do was sit in the shadows, so very alone and pining for the one thing he could never have.

A dual moan and a dimly lit shadow moving down told him that they had finished and Spy had bent down to give the doctor a kiss. Leaning forward just a bit, the Heavy strained his ears to hear what it was they were whispering to each other.

"Mon ami"

"Ja?"

"I love you.."

Heavy never heard the others answer that was enough, that was TOO much, practically eating his bottom lip to keep from saying anything the big man turned and snuck away as quietly as his his heavy frame would allow. But he didn't return to bed, returning to that standard issue mattress that just barely fit him would do nothing for him. He couldn't run to Sasha either, all she would do is suggest a rather gruesome death. No, instead he ran to the one person he always knew he could count on. Sandwich had never steered him wrong before. Even if it did mean he'd gain more weight and bring himself one step closer to death, he didn't care. It was better then this crushing sadness and the lonely feeling he got every time he watched them.

Heavy had just sat down to enjoy his third sandwich when he heard footsteps. Looking up to see who had joined him in the kitchen, he was surprised to see the medic standing in the doorway. His hair was a mess, most of the scars on his body were hid by the lack of light, and those glasses were perched on his nose in such a way that it hid how tired he was after that little bit of night time fun. But what caught Heavy's attention first was the fact that he was standing there in nothing but his boxers, blue cotton with little syringes decorating the fabric.

"Oh, Herr Heavy, vhat are you doing up so late?."

"Sandvich"

"Oh, vell don't eat too many..I am just here to get one for mein Spy."

As the doctor walked away Heavy took another angry bite of his sandwich. That hope in the back of his mind flared, he just had to wait a little longer, the frenchman would get tiresome and the medic would be looking for something more. When that day came Heavy would be there and then he would be the Medic was making sandwiches for, he'd be the one Medic made love to, he'd finally be the one Medic could call his. Once that day came, he'd make sure the Medic would never turn back.


	2. Chapter 2

"STUBBORN JACKASS!"

"IDIOTIC FRENCHIE!"

It seems Heavy had walked down the hall at just the right time. The two love birds seemed to be deep into a fight, the kind where you were just so pissed at each other that it had whittled down to nothing but sputtered nonsense and pointless swearing and lame comebacks just because neither of them was ready to end the argument. Staying close by so he could listen to the two yell at each other, the big man flinched when he suddenly heard the deafening sound of a door being slammed shut so hard it was a wonder it didn't just fall right off the hinges. Following the sound was the still sputtering frenchman, who walked right past Heavy then disappeared under the cover of a cloak so he could storm off and be by himself without anyone knowing where he was.

As much as Heavy wanted to rush right into the room and make sure the doctor was ok, that would be an obvious sign of his eavesdropping. So instead he waited impatiently, his tiny head counting little sashas until he thought enough time had passed. Then as calmly as he could, Heavy approached the door and opened it.

"Vhat do you vant Heavy?"

The older man had apparently plopped down at his desk after the fight and was making angry, scribble like notes on a piece of paper when he entered. The russian's steps were heavy enough that no one had to look up to know when it was him in the room, so he wasn't surprised when Medic kept his eyes on his work.

"I don't feel right"

This wasn't exactly a lie, Heavy felt so wrong.. having to just sit back and watch while the man he loved was loved by another man, and now when the same man was very obviously having problems and there was nothing he could do to help.

"Obviously"

The doctor was also use to Heavy's slow way of thinking, and you could see that he was making a effort to curb his anger and be patient and calm while talking with the big guy. But after the anger subsided there would be sadness, and Heavy knew it, no one liked fighting with their love. If only Heavy could keep the other company long enough, maybe he would see the doctor fall and he could give him that comfort the big teddy bear of a man so desperately wanted to give him. But he was not a very good liar, and lacked a big enough imagination to fake symptoms or come up with a disease right off the bat. He didn't think he could lie to the Medic anyway.. but was now really the time for the truth?.

Instead of saying anything Heavy just took a seat on the patient table, hearing the table give a slight groan under his weight. The silence gave Medic time to achieve that calm he had been working towards, but now that his anger at the spy was gone he was not so patient, and was tired of waiting for the Heavy to go into further details about his supposed illness.

"Get on vith it."

Heavy blinked, then bit his lip, then just finally sighed.. he was going to have to watch what he said, he didn't want to enrage Medic or make him remember Spy right now.

"I don't think this is right"

The medic looked confused, and Heavy tried explaining again without giving too much away.

"This, these things that happen now. The fighting is not right. I don't think you deserve it."

Medic looked a little shocked, then angry again.

"You heard us fighting?."

Heavy just chuckled, if he was going to be leaving out parts of the truth, might as well add a little to it to replace those parts.

"Everyone could've heard the doktor and frog fighting. You are very loud."

Medic growled and turned away from the larger man.. this was going to be harder then he thought.


	3. Chapter 3

It was going to be hard but that didn't mean it was totally impossible.

Heavy got up from where he had been sitting and carefully took a few steps towards the doctor, not entirely sure what the angry man would do to him if he got too close but just unable to stay away from someone that seemed to needed a hand like this. Especially when it was the Medic that needed that help. When he was close enough Heavy put a hand on Medic's shoulder and thought of something to say in their common tongue that would sooth the man and make things ok enough for them to talk again without the german's temper getting the best of him.

"It doesn't have to be this way.."

Medic swatted his hand away and turned to look up at the large man. Still very angry but with a hint of that confusion.. and something else that Heavy couldn't make out in that stare of his. But before the man could even open his mouth to scold him or yell or whatever it was he planned to do Heavy continued on with what he was saying.

"you could have someone who loves you little doktor."

This didn't seem to be exactly what Medic expected to hear, because he did look surprised, then his mouth set into a thin line and that anger was back.

"Spy loves me"

but Heavy just shook his head, still trying to find a way to tell him just exactly how he feels. He wanted nothing more then to make him understand that the frenchman wasn't right for him, that if he was just do away with him and learn to love someone else, that Heavy would show him what love really was and not have to ever see such a face on the other man ever again.

"Frog doesn't love doktor, you wouldn't yell like that if you were loved."

Heavy put his hand back on Medic's shoulder as the man stopped to think about this, eventually pushing his glasses up higher on his nosed and looking up at the russian again. He didn't seem angry anymore, but he wasn't happy either, his gaze was hard and so serious it made Heavy feel like squirming while under it. But he didn't stare, instead he set the Medic with a very serious but soft gaze of his own. Stopping the doctor from once again saying anything by letting more words tumble out of his mouth before he lost his nerve to say them.

"I know.. because Heavy loves you little doktor and would never yell like that. Doktor does not need to be sad and angry, but happy and have a smile on his face."

Putting his other hand on Medic's other shoulder, Heavy pulled the frozen man closer and into a gentle embrace that was something close to a hug. Putting just enough force into it for there to be pressure, but keeping a check on his strength so that he didn't crush Medic and snap his spine in half or something like that. Not that Medic was really fighting him anyway, and actually leaned on Heavy and started to put his arms around him too, when the doors of the med bay slid open and the two felt a set of eyes on the two of them.

"Gentlemen..."

Spy's voice made Heavy growl a little and his tight unconsciously tighten around the Medic. Like he was keeping him from being taken away right now by the stupid frenchman that would just continue to ruin things until there was just nothing left. When Medic's arms dropped back down to his sides Heavy snapped back to reality and he eased up on his hold and dropped one arm, still keeping a hand on Medic's shoulder as he turned to face the spy.

"Explain yourselves."


	4. NOTICE

**IMPORTANT NOTICE:**

I have been trying for weeks now to get something going for Longing, and I have a whole document of ideas and plans I had been wanting to do for this piece. But unfornuately my muse for this fic has died, and it died hard. I no longer have any interest in continuing the fic, even though I tried and tried until I gave myself a headache to at least write enough to give you a decent ending... it seems I couldn't even bring myself to do that much.

**BUT WAIT!**

Don't give up hope just yet. As long as you are willing to listen to the plan I already have laid out and allow me to publish the chapters on my accounts so that my fan can finish reading this story. I have no problem letting one of you finish this for me. Of course I'll give you credit.. I just... don't want to see a fic like this end this way. I want to see it FINISHED!.

If you think you'd like to give it a shot then by all means send me a PM. I'll tell you whats up and see what we can do.

It may not be the best way to do things, but at least we'll get to see if Heavy ends up with Medic or not right?.


End file.
